Dear tired mama: You are not alone. I get you. I see you.
I am in the stage of life that is characterized by chaos, cleaning up messes, and refereeing sibling squabbles. My kids are seven and a half, six, four and two. I haven’t slept through the night in years except for the rare night away I get with my husband (make that happen, if at all possible, at least twice a year! Your marriage is worth it!).
My kids have had colds lately so that’s made for some rough and heavily interrupted nights. And my two year old is still nursing so she doesn’t sleep through the night yet. It is HARD. If you are in this season, I 100% understand.
I’m right there with you.
Even if you’re only holding on to Jesus by a thread– and some days I feel like that– don’t let go. Cling harder. I have determined to try to get up before my kids most days to spend time in the Word and in prayer because there is nothing more important than learning to rely on Jesus. Even sleep isn’t as important as leaning on God for strength, wisdom and patience!
When I try to trust in my own strength to get through a day, I fail, and fail miserably. Those are the days I’m short-tempered, lacking in patience and self-control, and ungracious with my family. The peace in our home takes a major hit as a result.
But on my better days, I trust God’s promises to strengthen and uphold me, to give me new grace every day, and to provide for all my needs: sleep and stamina included! When I rely on him for patience, kindness, gentleness and self-control, I am a happier mama and better able to deal with the many stresses and frustrations that each day brings.
I take comfort in God’s promises. Satan tries so hard to distract me from the truth of God’s Word, so it’s necessary to take measures to remind myself regularly! Some different ways you can practice hiding God’s words in your heart, and keeping them at the forefront of your thoughts and attention, include:
- Write verses on colorful post-it notes to place in locations you’ll see them often, such as your fridge, medicine cabinet, car dashboard, where you store your keys or purse, etc.
- Write directly on a mirror or window– I like writing a verse on the window above my kitchen sink, because I’m in front of it many times a day. FYI, Sharpie works just as well as a dry erase marker and easily comes off with window cleaner!
- Draw/color the verse, either with fancy handwriting if you happen to know how to do that, or just writing it neatly and adding color. You could even frame this if you like how it turns out! Or if you have graphic design skills, you could create an artistic image of your favorite verses to print or turn into computer or phone backgrounds.
- Listen to them! Many Psalms have been turned into songs and are easily singable. Steve Green’s Hide ‘Em In Your Heart series is designed for kids but the songs are wonderful for the whole family to listen to, and make the verses easily memorizable.
- Write a list of verses that are most meaningful and helpful to you, and read them aloud with your family at mealtimes or during family devotions.
These are some verses that are especially encouraging and comforting to me, both as a mother and in general through life’s trials and struggles.
He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.
Isaiah 40:11
Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
Lamentations 3:22-23
Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.
Psalm 63:7-8
In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat— for he grants sleep to those he loves.
Psalm 127:2
Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you.
James 4:7-8b
This is what the Lord says: “Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches, but let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the Lord, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,” declares the Lord.
Jeremiah 9:23-24
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
Proverbs 3:5-6
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
Romans 8:28
Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:35-39
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7
For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith– and this not from yourselves, it is the gift God– not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.
Ephesians 2:8-10
Practically speaking, nap when your kids do if you can, even if that means a group nap with everyone in your bed! (I just napped with my two girls yesterday. Worth it!) If you’re like me and enjoy staying up late, try exercising the discipline to go to bed just a little earlier.
Take care of yourself physically: drink plenty of water, eat nourishing foods, move your body, and do something every day that brings you joy. In my case that is often a solo shower because I love my showers!
Remember to work as a team with your husband and lean into connection and intimacy with him because your kids will benefit so much from your marriage being strong.
Above all, remember that God has called you to the vocation of motherhood and he will give you the strength to fulfill that calling as you seek to obey him!
