Parenting Archives - LUTHERWOMAN

Why Can’t I Fix My Child?

It’s a dark crisp fall morning. The street lights are still on and there is hardly any traffic on the roads.

It is time to wake up my teenage daughter for school. My daughter is not a morning person much like her Dad and really struggles to get out of bed every day. However, her struggle to get out of bed is even harder as she wrestles with major depression and other mental health problems. I dread waking her up most mornings because the struggle is real. The struggle isn’t only on her but for me to encourage and motivate her to get ready for school. If you have any experience with depression or anxiety, getting out of bed can be really tough. It is challenging even as a parent to motivate myself in a loving way daily to get her out of bed.

It Was Today

It was today. I knew it was coming, but had no way of knowing this would be that day.

Backstory: We knew the diagnosis ten years ago when we adopted our son…Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy (DMD). He was 7 weeks old, and due to biology and family history of Duchenne, genetic testing had already been completed. Two years later, we adopted his little brother, knowing the likelihood (50% chance) of him having the same diagnosis. After genetic testing was completed, we received confirmation that he also has Duchenne.

The formal definition of DMD

Living Intentionally With Your Family

Habits. Routines. Oh, how I have a love/hate relationship with those words.

You too?

For the longest time, habits and routines sounded boring and stiff. Yet, the older I’ve gotten the more I understand why habits and routines are so key for the health of my family.

You may be like how I was, and sometimes still am, where I feel like life is happening more to me than I am making life happen. Things pop up on my schedule that I don’t remember putting there or don’t find fulfillment in. A month

Let’s Take Our Babies To Church

Church in early motherhood is…

…taking the whole pew because your kids will end up taking it over anyway.

…snack crumbs and loud rustlings when opening the snack bag.

…crayons. Hot wheels. Books. More books. All the toys because their little bodies want to play.

…telling your kids to whisper just for them to shout back at you, “What did you say, mama?!”

Mama, can I be honest with you?

When You Realize You Can’t Control Your Children–And That’s OK

If I’m honest, I think the most surprising thing about watching my five children grow up is how little resemblance they actually bear to me. They look like me, and have a few of my personality quirks, but at the end of the day they are completely different people.

One example: I love nature. Nature brings me joy. Science says nature is good for you. I want my children to grow up valuing nature. On the other hand, I have two sons who are homebodies and have no desire to ever leave the house. They love Minecraft, and reading, and drawing–none of which involve the Great Outdoors.

Three Guiding Words During The Parenting Years

Raising another human is…overwhelming. When we brought our first child home from the hospital, we were both struck that everything was now on us. There was no nurse down the hall as a back up. “Why did they let us take her home? What were they thinking? We are not prepared for this!”

My favorite mug states it well: “Today’s goal: Keep the tiny humans alive.” It is a monumental task. It’s also the most important thing we’ll ever do. But hey, no pressure.
I’m on the other side of the parenting looking glass now. I moved from full-time to consultant status several years ago. We raised 2 daughters and now have 4 grandkids.

The Present Parent

If only parenting came with a “how-to” manual or a training guide. You can read all of the books out there on the market, and yet when that day comes, you may remember a nugget or two on the “how-to” that you’ve pocketed for later, but most likely, you’re going off of instinct. You start to just do. It’s trial and error day by day. This is what comes naturally.

However, there will be days you may think to yourself “Oh my goodness” …

-I totally failed
-That did not go as planned
-I’ve messed this kid/these kids up