Guilt

Not long ago, I saw an article about a fellow ministry family getting ready to move across the ocean to begin a new chapter in their ministry. How funny that this would show up today of all days, as we are preparing for a trip home to see my dad’s family for a reunion. I grew up in a tight-knit family. We saw each other often, but it's been 15 years since I have seen most of them. Children have grown up, aunts and uncles have gone to their heavenly home and some are declining in health. Life in ministry is a two edged sword: very rewarding as well as very much a struggle.

Maybe these thoughts are in my head after the call I received on Father's day weekend, that my dad had fallen down the stairs and they were on their way to the hospital. Thank you, God, for only
I am one of those unicorn Christians who is still unmarried at 29 – I didn’t meet someone in high school, Christian college, or at camp. I listened to BarlowGirl’s vow to prolong dating, read Harris’ I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and signed my purity pledge at a “True Love Waits” event.

I kept waiting for that magical moment when some young whippersnapper approached me and asked for my hand where I could I reply “No more dating, I’m just waiting” while waving my purity ring in his face, triumphantly.

Unfortunately, I never was faced with this situation, and my understanding of purity and sex
Have you ever been in a situation where you did something—or something was done to you—that made you feel ashamed? A time that you were so hurt, embarrassed, or humiliated that you could hardly stand to look in the mirror? A time that you even thought, “If they knew _____ about me, they would never look at me the same way again”? Have you ever thought terribly negative things about yourself? “I’m a failure. I’ve made too many mistakes in my life. Maybe I’m just a mistake. I’m not worthy of being loved.”

Dear sister, don’t live in shame! That’s a burden you weren’t meant to bear!